Welcome to Glass Slipper! Look up Justin Verlander’s record this year; please enjoy the show.

- Jacob Rhee

**NOTICE: Glass Slipper will arrive on Monday and Thursday next week.

I recently unveiled the 13 college football teams that have a chance of winning the national title. It’s time we break down each of those squads. The bane of my existence slots in at No. 10, the Michigan Wolverines.

Offense

There are a lot of folks in Columbus clinging onto hope that Bryce Underwood is a phony. Exaggerating his flaws, claiming that he’s out of shape, giggling at his spring-game mediocrity. We can relax with all of that, guys.

I’ll never alter my earnest evaluation of a kid’s abilities based on which school they choose to attend. I thought Bryce was a fantastic player when he originally committed to LSU; that assessment didn’t magically evaporate upon his flip to Michigan. He’s going to be a problem soon enough.

I’m fully anticipating some growing pains in August and September, though. Underwood’s No. 1 option on paper is Donaven McCulley, a converted quarterback who never reached 80 receiving yards in a victory during his time at Indiana. Anthony Simpson - the dude that is supposedly next in the pecking order - has appeared in exactly two football games in the last 601 days. Even the Wolverines’ signature tight end factory is barren this year. It’s been over a decade since Michigan boasted a 1,000-yard pass-catcher, and the drought will continue.

While his weapons aren’t elite, Bryce should have the luxury of a highly-profitable ground attack. This is a rock-solid offensive line, opening creases for a running back duo that boasts nine combined recruiting stars. Sherrone Moore’s possession-limiting, shoulder-lowering, clock-milking operation is alive and well.

Defense

There’s some more bad news, Buckeye Nation. The Wolverines are absolutely nasty on this side of the ball again. A pair of top-13 picks - as well as third-round selection Josaiah Stewart - are gone from the defensive line, yet that group remains nationally elite. Derrick Moore and TJ Guy will hold it down on the edge, while soon-to-be household name Rayshaun Benny and Alabama transfer Damon Payne soak up the bulk of the snaps inside.

Linebackers Ernest Hausmann and Jaishawn Barham are each overdue for a leap.

Both dudes looked rather shaky in coverage a season ago, but the way they pursue and tackle in the run game is extremely impressive. Wink Martindale needs athletes and disruptors around the line of scrimmage to make that 4-2-5 scheme hum, and he has plenty of resources at his disposal.

I’d argue that the cornerback room is the weak link here. Jyaire Hill got relegated to a part-time role last fall, and he’s suddenly expected to take on all of the toughest assignments. I didn’t know Caleb Anderson existed seven months ago, but the Louisiana transfer likely slides into the CB2 role. Zeke Berry returns as the primary nickel; quite frankly, I think he’s the worst starter on the team. Although the Big Ten is not necessarily flooded with great wideouts, there’s one program that boasts a bunch of awesome ones. We’ll see if this Michigan group can survive on November 29.

The Wolverines allowed 17 points or fewer in eight(!!) consecutive contests to close 2024. That’s an unbelievable streak, and it will allow the Maize and Blue to stride into every stadium with the requisite confidence to win.

Season Outlook

Pre-Bowl Record Prediction: 9-3

Selection Sunday Fan Mood: Oh, just wait until next season. Year 2 for Bryce. Year 2 for Andrew Babalola. Year 2 for Andrew Marsh. 2025 was always supposed to be about transition. We’re coming for it all next September.

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