Welcome to Glass Slipper! Get me two more, Mr. Raleigh; please enjoy the show.

- Jacob Rhee

Here are my 10 biggest takeaways from Week 4 of the college football season.

1. Maryland has a quarterback!

I can only image how frustrating the Taulia Tagovailoa era was for Mike Locksley. The dude would keep you in a game with a mesmerizing drive, then make a childish decision to take you right out of it. Malik Washington was a high school student a few months ago, yet his on-field maturity is already superior. He understands the when and why behind taking risks.

I love what I’ve seen thus far. If Malik keeps rolling, the Terps could very well be 7-0 heading into November.

2. Broken record.

You guys know how tempted I am to embark on another Dabo Swinney soliloquy. The people have me covered for the time being, though.

A loss to LSU. Down 16-0 to Troy at home. A loss to Georgia Tech. A loss to Syracuse. Unequivocally indefensible. Let’s discuss the coach who did get the job done on Saturday…

3. Climbing the ladder.

Fran Brown is going to be floated as a candidate for all kinds of jobs at the end of the season.

He’s now 13-4 at Syracuse, and remains among the best recruiters in the sport. I haven’t even mentioned the ring on his finger from the Georgia days. Maybe Fran stays with the Orange until his son graduates, but those SEC offers will be difficult to ignore.

4. All smiles in Lubbock.

Texas Tech just went on the road, and beat the No. 16 squad in America by 24 points. By the way, the Red Raiders committed 14(!!) penalties, and their backup quarterback played almost the entire second half. When will the general public realize that this team is legit?

Every penny that was spent crafting the roster appears to have been worth it. Joey McGuire has a playoff berth in his future.

5. Where is Jaydn Ott?

It’s a genuine question. Like, I’m honestly just fascinated at this point.

Ott was one of five power-conference backs to rush for 1,300 yards and 12 touchdowns in 2023. The dude transfers to Oklahoma, and… vanishes into thin air. John Mateer and Brent Venables each offered rather eyebrow-raising comments about the situation recently; in very careful ways, they essentially relayed that Jaydn has not been fully invested. The Sooners gained a pitiful 1.2 yards per carry on Saturday; I’d suggest they get things straightened out with him as soon as possible.

6. Lighter fluid.

I speculated about a potential Ole Miss quarterback controversy last week. Well, here we are. Trinidad Chambliss submitted another brilliant performance, and pulled a big chunk of the fan base over to his side. The Rebels face three top-seven opponents in their next four contests. Which signal-caller will lead them into that gauntlet?

Even if we’re awarding Austin Simmons a few brownie points for his 2024 flashes, I’d personally roll with Chambliss. He’s earned the chance to prove that this reign of terror wasn’t a fluke. At the very least, give him the first 30 minutes against LSU.

7. A certified problem.

Justice Haynes is a superstar. It’s gravely concerning.

He’s everything that Michigan fans thought 2022 Donovan Edwards would blossom into. Haynes has reached 120 yards from scrimmage and scored a touchdown in each of the Wolverines’ first four games. I’m crossing my fingers that he gets all of the home runs out of his system before November 29.

8. That one Demi Lovato song from 2015.

Oh me, oh my.

Look, we praised Tommy Castellanos for backing up his tough talk. I suppose it’s only fair that we give Curt Cignetti a similar bouquet of flowers. 63-10? He developed Kurtis Rourke into an NFL draft pick, and now Fernando Mendoza is parked firmly inside first-round conversations. As long as the Hoosiers hang tough with both Oregon and Penn State, this performance gives them an outside chance to sneak into the bracket with 10 wins. Cignetti is coaching like a man who wants a statue someday.

9. Sleepless in Seattle.

College football is more fun when Washington is good. I can’t really explain why. This Huskies offense is borderline must-see television; Demond Williams provides consistent Kyler Murray flashbacks, and Jonah Coleman is one of the 25 best players in the country.

Ohio State comes to town in five days. It’s time to find out just how much juice Jedd Fisch’s crew possesses.

10. Time to peek ahead.

USC and Illinois at noon. LSU and Ole Miss at 3:30. Then, an amazing primetime window. It’s Oregon and Penn State on NBC, with Alabama and Georgia on ABC. I suggest you identify a comfy spot on the couch.

Pressroom

Spin It

“DANCE” by DNCE. Enjoy.