Welcome to Glass Slipper! Juan Soto is inevitable; please enjoy the show.

- Jacob Rhee

Every Sunday morning, I will make five bold predictions regarding the upcoming NFL games. Each time I get one incorrect, $10 is added to the money pot. At the end of the 18-week regular season, that pool of cash will be spent on gifts for random Glass Slipper subscribers. I hope you have a lot of fun rooting against me! Let’s go.

Prediction 1: 125+ total yards for Bijan Robinson against the Seahawks.

Poor Bijan has been so misused throughout his young NFL career that he’s only reached this threshold three times in 23 games. But Seattle just surrendered 107 points in an 11-day span, and Atlanta’s offense is starting to cook. The Falcons will jump out to an early lead, and let Robinson milk away the second-half clock.

Prediction 2: CJ Stroud and Jordan Love both finish with zero interceptions.

I think we have a nice, clean shootout on our hands. Stroud and Love have each been more careless with the ball than usual this season; that trend should begin to taper off this afternoon. It’s a beautiful day in Green Bay, and those fans in attendance picked a fantastic contest to watch. Last quarterback with the ball wins.

Prediction 3: Saquon Barkley scores 2+ total touchdowns against the Giants.

If you’re not interested in seeing repeated sad cutaways to John Mara, I’d suggest staying away from this game. New York’s owner infamously warned his GM Joe Schoen not to let Barkley go to Philadelphia, and it happened anyway.

In case you haven’t noticed, Nick Sirianni is an awfully vengeful human. He will undoubtedly give Saquon plenty of opportunities to stick it to his old franchise.

Prediction 4: San Francisco defeats Kansas City by 7+ points.

Including the playoffs, Patrick Mahomes has appeared in 119 NFL games. In those contests, the Chiefs have lost by 7 or more points only eight times. That’s legitimately almost impossible. There might not be a statistic in existence that better represents Kansas City’s dominance in recent years.

We’ll add one to that tally in eight hours, however. Andy Reid’s offense has been flat all season, and it now has to deal with arguably the two best defenders on the planet. Nick Bosa in particular is teed up for a massive performance; he’s been repeatedly robbed of sacks lately, and both of the Chiefs’ offensive tackles are vulnerable. I would not be surprised whatsoever if the former Buckeye takes this Super Bowl rematch over.

Prediction 5: Marvin Harrison Jr. finishes with 100+ receiving yards against the Chargers.

Speaking of dudes that played their college ball in Columbus, it’s time for Marv to shake loose again. He’s apparently healthy after suffering an ugly concussion a week ago, and the man is overdue for some splashes.

Quick, name a starting cornerback on the Chargers. That’s what I thought. LA’s defense fluffed up its numbers while facing some pathetic quarterback play, but I hope you weren’t fooled. This unit is ready to be exposed.

• Week 6 Results: 2-3

• Overall Season Picks Record: 9-21

• Current NFL Prize Pot: $210

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