Welcome to Glass Slipper! Someone remind me what happened the last time Patriots fans started bragging about a rookie quarterback wearing No. 10. I can’t quite remember; please enjoy the show.

- Jacob Rhee

After 14 years of mediocrity, a college football giant finally awoke last season. Now, one of the largest fan bases in the sport is eyeing a championship. Let’s discuss the #5 team in the Glass Slipper rankings, Texas.

Offense

Not everyone does, but I believe in Quinn Ewers. Don’t get me wrong, it took a long time for me to be sold on the kid. I’m an Ohio State fan; I watched Quinn reclassify so he could get to Columbus a year early, then dip when he realized that CJ Stroud was a star. I don’t necessarily blame him for transferring, but the fact that the top recruit in America left campus with more car commercials than pass attempts was still irritating. My saltiness caused me to root against him, and a part of that feeling still lingers to this day; the Buckeyes probably would’ve won the national title in January had Ewers stayed.

After a nondescript Year 1 in Austin, I thought Quinn looked like a totally different human in 2023. An electric wide receiver duo certainly helped, but I just loved the confidence that the guy displayed. It takes real poise and composure to go on the road and pick apart an Alabama defense, and Ewers did exactly that. He wasn’t perfect against Washington, but I liked the body language and demeanor. It felt like he belonged on that stage.

Things get dicey for Texas when we start examining the skill players. This running back room is paper-thin after starter CJ Baxter’s season-ending injury. I’m an Isaiah Bond stan, but I don’t love him as the No. 1 option on the outside. The addition of Silas Bolden should help the receiving core, but I think the Longhorns will need to call upon five-star freshman Ryan Wingo for a jolt of energy at some point.

The good news? Four of the five boys up front are back, and the lone new starter on the line is 6-foot-5, 335-pound right tackle Cameron Williams. Ewers might not get touched all season.

Defense

Texas’s dominant defensive tackle duo is gone, but I actually think the team takes a step forward on this side of the ball. Edge rushers Barryn Sorrell and Ethan Burke are both returning, and transfer addition Trey Moore - who had 22 sacks in his last two years at UTSA - will be in both of their rearview mirrors as a perpetual threat to steal snaps. Former five-star Anthony Hill Jr. headlines the linebacker room after a fantastic first collegiate season.

This is one of the five best secondaries in America. Malik Muhammad looks like a first-round pick in 2026, and the Longhorns successfully stole Andrew Mukuba from Clemson. As an Ohio State fan, I can confirm that it feels extremely satisfying to take an established starter from a fellow title contender. Everyone in this group for Texas is solid; that strong front seven will have plenty of time to get to the quarterback.

Season Outlook

Pre-Bowl Record Prediction: 10-2

Selection Sunday Fan Mood: They can’t keep us out, right? No. There’s no way. Thank you to the higher-ups that expanded the playoff. We have both a larger margin of error and the trusty SEC bias on our side now. Our beloved Longhorns might never miss the CFP again.

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“Dreamlover” by Mariah Carey. A classic.